My Dogs on Sara Palin

I overheard Mo trying to explain Sara Palin to Gatsby. Frustrated with him not knowing who this was he told this story.

Snow White, Superman and Pinocchio were in Las Vegas taking in some shows, losing some hard earned cash when they came to this billboard MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMEN IN THE WORLD CONTEST. Snow White said "I am going to enter this contest" and when she returned the others wanted to know how she did and she replied "I am the most beautiful women in the world. I won."

Upon coming to the next billboard which read THE STRONGEST MAN IN THE WORLD CONTEST. Superman said "I am going to enter" and upon returning the others wanted to know how he did. "I am the strongest man in the world. I won." he replied.

The next billboard read THE GREATEST LIAR IN THE WORLD. "This should be a piece of cake for me" said Pinocchio. Upon returning the other wanted to know how he did. "Not too well" replied Pinocchio, "who the heck is Sara Palin?"

I walked away chuckling but wondered if anyone else got Mo's sense of humor.

Dog food (not soup) for the chicken soul

I love to look at the stars and camp under in the wild but I am rather afraid of the dark. I have been since I was very young and have never really mastered it nor felt comfortable alone in the dark. I am not sure why I am so afraid of the dark but lets blame it on my parents.
I never knew my real dad as he left when I was 2 years old and my mom had her hands and brain too full for security of a little scarity cat. My step father could have a mean streak (and my mom also) when he was drinking or actually anytime if we ate all the ice cream before he got home...go get a branch out of the yard , drop your pants, learn a lesson. Great lesson for little kids. At any rate anger, conditions, insecurity have all played a part in this almost phobia. (my phobia is small tight spaces...add the dark now that should make anyone cry)
Now I get a chance to introduce you to the second partner in small town crime. His name is Gatsby. He loves to be with me all the time except at night or when the house gets too warm then he sleeps outside. He is deathly afraid of the pet clippers so I must use the sissors yet he loves his night walks and camping trips and he will get between me and a bear as he did in Aspen, Colorado. The dogs smelled the bear long before I saw him. I am less afraid of bears than walking down an alley alone at night. The dogs quickly took notice of their "mortal enemy" and began the rapid approach and vociferously alerted the bear of priorities. My dogs listens well and came to my side and Gatsby leaned against me when I called him as did Mo who had been bouncing up and down and rearing on his hind legs to make himself taller. Even as Gastby quivered unrestrained against me (partly from fear I am sure but partly from the desire to drive the beast to its mountainous retreat). I never felt more protected, more in control, more a part of life and the greatness of man, dog, and wild animals. And night skies.
So now you know how a scared little boy can grow up to freely camp where he wants and sit in the dark of the night with skies so full as to remind one of our small contribution to this package of earth and skies and companions.

No fly in this ointment

Well I have decided not to tick (pun intended) everyone off on my first post. That comes later.

I am the best friend of Mo and Gatsby and can't help but wonder what they think when I do crazy things, like leave them for a month when I go rafting down the Grand Canyon, work well into the night and sometimes all night on dumbass things or eat lettuce and broccoli. I always miss them when I am gone but there they are with my neighbor who feeds and talks to them and cleans up after them while I ride the whitewater without them (dogs are not allowed).

This morning the flies were especially ferocious. We live in an ag/ranching community in Colorado and the cows are only blocks not miles away and I do not eat meat. What a shame...when times are lean I could just pluck me one, feed the 3 of us for the winter and no one would be the wiser. Many famous cattle rustlers have adorned the pages of the history of the west and I could have joined the ranks of infamy if only... but I guess that is just another great quest side railed by destiny. Ahhh but I do digress. A fly landed on the nose of my big dog, I grabbed the swatter and (no, no, no... I know what you are thinking I did not swat his nose) I simply shooed the fly away whereby he did not heed the warning shot but chose to land on Mo's shoulder. During this Mo kept his eyes on me, boy that dog has big brown eyes (I have always told Mo if I were a girl dog I sure would hang around him a lot although it would be to no avail as he has been clipped), Mo just lay there on his side with his head on the floor and his eyes on me but held perfectly still. Normally he and Gatsby spend a good deal of time snapping at flies, shaking their heads, or twitching (sometimes with success but usually for naught). The fly then foolishly landed on his shoulder thinking this was a free space but I quickly and deftly swatted Mo with just enough force to knock the bugger to the ground, Mo's eyes followed the fly to the floor just in front of him, where I proceeded to end the reign of terror this one had imposed upon man's laziest and of course best friend. Sometimes I wish they could help hang drywall, or electrical work, help with work around the house or even take out the trash (sound a little like your problem with the sig-other ladies). But that is all wishful thinking as I have asked them many times if any of these hold an interest for them. Nope they just put their heads back on the floor or my foot and go back to sleep and wait for the call to walk or eat or maybe a new visitor (which of course has dropped into see them).

Now you have to understand Mo a little more as he is a big 150 lb dog and has a tremendous streak of stubbornness in him due to the Pyrenees but he has Airedale also so the attributes kind of cancel each other out and he becomes Mo. Well Mo closed his eyes and went back to sleep and I sat wondering what kind of trust would it take for me to allow a friend or you to do the same thing. Dang I don't think I would let you have a fly swatter anywhere close to my face. Not that I think you would do anything cruel ....or would you? I guess that is the whole gist of it. Sometimes I just sit and listen to the 2 dogs snore and the dog smell (sometimes I get closer just to smell them and it is not offensive at all as I don't sniff the southern region like they do. Unless of course they have been out in the rain then they have to stay on the porch) permeates the air. I know and they know it is safe here. For all of us. We have no guns, no knives, no bazookas, no traps just each other.

Now I am not sure if you were here in this same town, in this same house, this same room that I could count on you sleeping there on my floor, with your certain indobiosmell, and the specific sound of your snoring and make me feel safe and loved. Yes loved. One may question a dogs ability to love but when I return home from a month raft trip (or just a trip to the next town for groceries)the way they whine and carry on for the longest time I know that dogs have a greater capacity for love than even I do for them. Which if you have followed along is fairly overwhelming.

This is nothing against you (the reader personally. you are just simply following your humanality) of course but dogs have very little in the way of agenda where humans and human brains have greatly complicated not only workings of life but our feelings of safety. Humans have not only threatened their own world but the world of my dogs. Humans have brought destruction to new levels and a hate of each other for which my dogs could never want to think. When life is lean we all tighten our proverbial belts and go on... but when hate, hurt, greed, cruelty, and dogma (this time no pun intended and my sincere apologies to my dogs for slanderous use of the species)of narrow minded humans is added into the mix I do not feel safe and the kindred spirit of man or women can be greatly tested.

I am not so naive to not understand the conditions of a capitalistic and of a gregarious society. But I will never exploit, hurt, or hate my dogs (or the mean dog down the street) based on money, religion, sex, race, political orientation. Sometimes it is hard to believe in this same concept for my spaceship earth compatriots.